Background Bother

The bother of being an artist is that you have to do more than just make art (like making websites explaining what you do). Don't get me wrong, I love to talk about my art. I’d just rather be doing it than writing about it. Talking that is. About Art. So, at the peril of sounding…wordy… a bit of my background.

I’m not one of those artists who knew what they were going to do from day one. I just doodled and scribbled stuff like any other kid. I still feel like I lack drawing skills (which I’m told is an essential skill for artists- woops). That’s probably why I’m a painter. Painting is much more forgiving. (although…also involves some drawing… but I can do it in charcoal- so easier to erase, or smudge around.)

Like most things organic, creative forces don’t move in straight lines. I zig-zagged around in the realm of written and physical arts like story-writing and acting as a youngster. I still love writing and have been known to read scripts out loud. 

I began painting in my early twenties before bringing a daughter into the world and throwing myself into the retail pet industry. I’ve always loved animals and am drawn to all things “sciencey”. So, it was a great time to learn more about the things that fascinate me.
For 13 of those years, I owned and ran my own retail store. I practiced my customer service skills and learned I wasn’t a good employee manager. I like to think I’d do better today. (My apologies to all who had to endure me. I hold a cache of regrets for those times.) Most of my creative energy then went into advertising and design work for the store. I lived and learned over and over through those years. I've done my best to continue to try to improve as a person. 

After selling my store and making some big Life changes, I stumbled my way into more living and learning that moved me from Washington State back to California, where I'd grown up. This time I landed in Sacramento. And it was Pandemic time. More change.

I am forever grateful to have had the support I needed from my wonderful aunt and my loving cousin and her husband. They gave me places to stay and begin to find my way back to Art.
My cousin encouraged me to read The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. We read it together. It opened the creative flood gates. It gave us an opportunity to think and talk about what the word Art means. What it sounds like. What it feels like. It was the beginning of recognizing myself as an Artist with a capital A.

My cousin deserves a lot of credit for helping me grow into the comfort of saying ‘I’m an Artist’ out loud. It still feels like a brag rather than just a fact. I suppose that’s just my belief that Artists are special. I believe art is a gift to the world and takes on so many forms, but it still seems like something other people do better. 

It’s been an erratic path for me, with plenty of ups and downs. Lots of ideas and plenty of dry spells. I guess that’s a creative way of saying I’m not always consistent. My art doesn’t exactly always go as planned…or have a plan.
Sometimes I can focus and other times I get distracted by things I tell myself I “should” be doing instead of painting. I admit discipline is not one of my consistent attributes. (Attributes can be sporadic.)

I do have goals though. They change a lot, but when I have them I tend to go all in. My current goal is to make my art into the focus of my lifestyle rather than trying to fit it into the time I have for it. So that’s why I’m here. Doing my best to reach my goal while not pretending that I’ll be perfect about it. Just being and doing the best I can right now. 

Right now that looks like working as a live theater production assistant, trying to design, paint, write and create when I can, while trying to find footing in this cyclone of a world that refuses us any sense of peace. Add on the attempt to navigate toward self-improvement when everyone is looking for which enemy camp you belong to...and yeah, like I said...Life.

Like all of us, I run into judgements- from myself and other people. I get worried about failure. I compare myself to other artists. I struggle with how to make enough, do enough, make a difference, do the hard stuff, live life, figure out what ‘happy’ means, figure out what the smart thing is, what the responsible thing is- can I be peaceful while still being engaged in the crazy world around me….on and on….you get the idea….Life.

It brought me here writing to you. I’m very grateful you’ve stayed with me this far. If you keep exploring, you’ll stumble upon the part of this website that gives you a little more insight into how I see the world and why I created this place for us to meet. I hope you continue to poke around and find it.

The product designs on this website are created from my own artwork and ideas. My hope is to offer you something you can’t find anywhere else. As an Artist, I continue to explore new ways to create art that brings me pleasure. Creating something I know you, or someone you know will enjoy brings me that feeling I closely associate with ‘happiness’. It doesn’t always reflect who I am, just the way I do things. I, myself am attracted to styles of art that I don’t create. I often wonder why I create things with so much color and light when black is my go-to color of choice. I’ll leave that one for my therapist to sus out.

I'm easily distracted and can be a bit obsessive at times. That means I may have a lot of one thing and then suddenly nothing’s the same. I typically paint with acrylic inks and paints, as well as using charcoal, graphite, watercolor pencils and pastels. I’ve been known to play around with food and other workable mediums to create something different. I’m currently working on plans to add two...OK three… new elements to my artwork. (Stay tuned)

My designs come from a variety of inspirations, distractions, investigations and obsessions. Nature is high on my list of inspiring visuals. There are depths of possibilities in things both gigantic and microscopic in the world around us. There's comedy, drama, romance, and horror out there in Mother Nature’s domain. It all has incredible lighting and endless storylines. There's nothing that can't be found in Nature. 

The more people like you show interest in my designs, the more I can create and share. You may not realize it but, it's people like you who make it possible to put more Art out in the world.  And Art makes the world a better place. See how you did that?. You make the world a better place.
So I’ll keep designing. You keep doin’ what you do. Try not to let everything else bother you.